I thought it was awesome. I had finally figured it out (or so I thought) and was excited to share. But when I finally did, he didn’t say a word and moved onto something else. Now I’m left wondering how bad I really suck at it. It must be really bad or there wouldn’t have been the silence. Maybe it was only good in my mind because I wanted it so badly.
All my life, I’ve wished I could be one thing. Okay, two if you count being thin. Do you have those “If only ________, then my life would be perfect” moments? I usually fill in the blank with these:
1. I could lose 50 pounds
2. I won the lottery
3. I had finished with a bachelors degree
4. I could leave my fucking hair alone and let it get long
5. I could sing
Its number five on the list, but its number one in my heart. I’d take it over losing the weight or even winning the lottery, I think. Something inside me wants it so bad, and I’ve been working on it as much as I can, but I’m still not pleased. I had a small breakthrough, I thought, but the response wasn’t there.
It probably sounds all cryptic and confusing to you, but makes perfect sense to me, and I guess thats all that matters. Sometimes my blog is used for cheap therapy.
That’s a new pic of yours truly taken yesterday. Its one of the rare photos of myself that I actually like. I took about 15 of them and was only pleased with 1. That speaks volumes.
I died and went to karaoke heaven last Thursday night, where I gave my best performance ever. I started doing some vocal training a few days before. On karaoke night, I was doing those silly vocal exercises in the shower. You know…. the ones that make you sound like a drooling baby? Well, they must’ve worked because I actually did a good job singing! I chose You Were Meant For Me by Jewel. I had forgotten about that song until I heard someone sing it last week, so I thought I would give it a try. Jeff says I did well because I didn’t have time to think. I do have this BIG problem with thinking too much, which is why I literally lay there for 2 hours before I finally fall asleep. Anyway, I put my name on the list early because I was afraid of someone else getting to that song before me. Before I knew it, they were calling my name and everything moved so fast. I literally sang in a way I never thought I could sing and now… I just wanna sing sing sing all the time! Now I have to come up with more songs for karaoke night. Any ideas?
